Life is like a roller coaster – dealing with chronic pain!

Here I am, once again, trying to catch up on my blog! My excuse? I’ve been ill (and maybe a teenzy weenzy lazy, in between).

I should really be used to this by now, I shouldn’t really let it throw me for a loop like it does. But guess what? I’m not ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

I’m into my 7th year of this 24/7 chronic migraine and tension headache roller-coaster, and you would think I would be able to rise above it and not let it stop me in my tracks… but you know what? You can have as many intentions as you wish, but when your body rules your life, there isn’t always that much you can do about it.. other than hang on for the ride.

I know it’s sounding like I’m using this as an excuse for not keeping up with my decluttering, my blog and keeping up with you all, and yeah.. I kinda am. It’s just.. ย it’s a darn good excuse, because it’s a reality I live in on a daily basis.

Having an chronic illness, kinda beats the crap out of you sometimes, and makes it’s hard to stay on track with your plans.

It’s kinda like when you’re good, you’re good ๐Ÿ™‚ , when you’re bad… oh boy…

I have this base headache that is just there all the time, 24/7. Thankfully the base headache is currently on a level, where I most of the time manage to go through my day without to much trouble. On top of my base headache I get migraines. On a good run my migraines only hit me maybe a couple of times a week, other times though – its a daily occurrence.

As with most headaches/migraines there are level of pain (that might or might not need to be treated with medication). Sometimes medication help and I can go about my day but now and then the migraines areย completely debilitating. Debilitating to the point where no medication seem to help and your brain seem to want to burst out of your scull. And those are the bad days!

Those days where you are hurting so much you just want to cry, but you can’t really do that as crying makes your head hurt even more, but then you can’t help yourself and you cry anyway. Those are the days where you can no longer muster up a smile to the people around you because if you look up, it hurts you head. Those are the days you hide at home, because there is no way you can possibly fake having a “good day” in public, cause your look is a dead giveaway.. that is, if you made it out of bed.ย Those are the days that you kinda wish someone would just chop your head off, but that would kinda render you dead, so that’s not really a good idea now is it? (it would surely take care of that headache though ๐Ÿ˜‰ ).

And then you have the really, really bad days. The days where you are seriously contemplating going to the hospital.. but you’ve tried that a few times already… and they can’t seem to help you there either.

Lately, I’ve had a bit of a bad run. Not only with the regular migraines, but a run that has included a couple of the really, really bad days. The ones that completely knock you for a loop, where you want to cry, go to the hospital and have you head chopped off.. all at once.

Over these last 7 years, I have had all of 12 seconds being totally pain free (boy, did I enjoy ย the heck out of those 12 seconds ๐Ÿ˜‰ ). I have however not given up hope, that I – one day… ย will be pain free – or rather headache free… I am (after all) getting older, and my right hip and shoulder isn’t always all that.. but that’s age for you ๐Ÿ˜‰

As bad as my head gets at times, I’m so thankful it’s not something more serious I struggle with, I do after all have it pretty easy, compared to a lot of other people.

There are many out there that have really serious problems, debilitating diseases and illnesses that might end up taking their lives. My heart goes out to them all! Compared to them, I have an exceptional good life.

There are times it’s hard for the people that sees me to understand how my day is, as most of the time I don’t look sick at all. Not only do I “fake” it good, when I’m not feeling too god, but migraines/headaches is often an invisible disease, one that is hard to explain to someone whose never ever had one.

A few years ago, I came across “The Spoon Theory”, a personal story andย a simple analogy by Christine Miserandinoโ€™s of what it is like to live with a chronic illness or disability. Christine herself has lupus.

Even though I’m a complete lightweight compared to people with that kind of disability, it still struck a chord, because it explains so well (to a healthy person) how it is to live with chronic pain.

If there are any of you that struggles with chronic pain, or have people in your life that struggles with this. If you haven’t already, I would recommend that you read the “The spoon theory”, at But You Don’t Look Sick, It helps put things into perspective.

I’m not writing this for sympathy, cause I know you have my back! I’m writing this to explain why my posting is (and has been for quiteย some time) so intermittently, why you don’t see me much on your own blogs. And why, when I do find your blog, I “spam” you with likes instead of taking the time to write comments, as I’m trying to “catch up”.

I’m working my way through this spell, and I’m sure you’llย see me soon here at the blog. But if you don’t, I just want to let you know, I’m not gone, I’m just pacing myself.. and I’ll be popping by every chance I get, hanging out with you all here at the blogoshere ๐Ÿ™‚

I kinda miss you, you know ๐Ÿ˜‰

 

๐Ÿ“ŒPS. This was not really what I was thinking of ย writing today, as my plan involved a declutter post… but sometimes my mind has a mind of its own… ย and all I can do is hang a left and follow along! ๐Ÿ™‚

30 comments

  1. Gilly

    Oh my goodness – that just sucks ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I do feel for you – I cannot imagine living with a permanent base headache and then getting migraines on top – how debilitating that must be. My mum suffered like that for years too and then one day, it just stopped. She was shocked, we were shocked, everyone was shocked! And the headaches and migraines never returned. No one knows why. I sincerely hope that happens to you – and SOON. Isn’t it strange how a post just writes itself sometimes when you had planned something else – I do that too. Hoping for a sudden miracle for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

      I’m sorry your mum had to struggle with that, and I’m so happy it suddenly stopped to never return again. I’m kinda waiting for that day myself ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Yes it’s funny how sometimes things roll out of you, so much so that your sitting there a little later and wonder, what in the world!!!?? I think I might have been a bit exasperated about the whole migraines and in general feeling like crap and not getting to do the things I really wanted to do… seems like the frustrations needed to come out somehow… lol. And here we are a blogpost later ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Jen

    I hope you’re able to find a little relief once in awhile. I have a good friend who gets migraines and it’s scary sometimes listening to her describe the pain.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

      Absolutely have some good days here and there… good thing too, if not I’m afraid you would find me in straight jacket in an asylum somewhere ๐Ÿ˜‚

      Im sorry for your friend, this stuff is not something I would wish on even my worse enemy, let alone friends, my โค๏ธ goes out to her.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

      Today was a better day, thank you ๐Ÿ˜€

      I’m with you on the medication, I alternate between meds for that exact reason… to avoid medicine induced pain (I love, not, how one of the side effects of migraines meds are headaches… crazy stuff) and addiction.

      My preference is off course NO meds… I actually hate taking them and try the longest not to, unfortunately sometimes that means I take them to late and presto my head gets worse… it’s not always easy to walk the very thin line of not taking a lot of meds and takin enough that your life is bearable… so far it seems like I’ve managed to stay on that fine line semi ok ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Liked by 2 people

        • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

          That’s true, pain can be invisible. In one way I’m kinda happy I manage to hide it as well as I do, I don’t want people to walk around feeling sorry for me all the time… but then, there are times I kinda wish it would show better, so people would understand… kind of a catch 22 that one ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„

          Liked by 3 people

            • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

              How long does it last? I think that is a bit depending on if they find the perfect spot…
              I’ve had a lot of trouble with my right hip the last few years and at the end it was so bad I could not sleep on that side. I got my first shot September last year, the second shot November and within a short time I could sleep on it no problem and my hip has been really good since… so in this case it’s been holding up for at least 9 months.

              My right shoulder (which had gotten rapidly bad after I fell off the ladder last summer) I could also not sleep o, when I went to get my first shot in February which killed a lot of the pain (and even had the “side effect” of making my headaches better… ) my second shot I got in April, and my shoulder has been really good until four weeks ago when I got some exercises from a physical therapist that obviously did NOT agree with my shoulder at all and also made my head seriously bad ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

              It’s been getting a bit better the last few days so it’s on the mend again.. but safe to say I won’t be doing any of those exercises anytime soon ๐Ÿ˜‰ I have a new appointment with my shoulder specialist in a week or so.. so I’m curious to see what he says about leaving it alone or considering one more shot. I’m kinda hoping he will consider another shot as I’m hoping it will help on my headache like the first shot did (here is to crossing all fingers and toes) ๐Ÿ˜‰

              How is your shoulder doing? Have they figured out what to do about it?

              Liked by 1 person

            • declutteringthestuff

              Thanks for asking! My shoulder (after a fall too!) has a small tear in the rotator cuff. I’ve opted to not have surgery since Dr. said it is at a spot that would not be easy to fix. He also said I have some capsulitis and gave me a cortisone shot. Guess we are in the same boat!!

              That is so weird/cool that a shot in your shoulder helped your headaches. I guess I would be asking for another shot! My Dr. said shoulder rehab can take years – guess we both have a ways to go before we are “back to normal”.

              Until your most recent PT oops, did you seem to think PT was helpful. Until recently, it seemed to be working but now it seems to have plateaued. Another on of those “guess time will tell” situations.

              Liked by 1 person

            • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

              I’ve had bad experiences with PT, so I mostly don’t do them… (it doesn’t take a lot before my headaches gets really bad) this was just a short session to get some exercises I could do at home, but off course I just had to run into one that did me in ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

              I’m sorry it’s not a quick fix for your shoulder… I guess with some cases there really are no such thing as a quick fix, guess we will just have to hang in there and give our bodies whatever how long it needs ๐Ÿ™‚

              I’m sure we will come out OK at the other end.. somehow ๐Ÿ˜‰

              Liked by 1 person

  3. nrhatch

    Headaches are HORRID. I can’t seem to accomplish anything when my head is pounding. Dealing with what you’re dealing with is NOT for the faint-hearted. You are a real trooper, Anne

    Best of luck in ridding your head of unwanted tenants.

    BTW: Do you meditate? If you don’t, it would be an inexpensive experiment. Just close your eyes and B~R~E~A~T~H~E! De-stressing a bit may offer some relief.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

      Yes they are, pretty horrid, it’s not like it’s easy to get out of your own head ๐Ÿ˜‰ I obviously need to do a little decluttering up there, LOL

      I’m sorry you struggle with them too, sucks really ๐Ÿ˜ข it’s not something I would want anyone to have to deal with…

      I’m not all that good with meditation… I seem to have to many ants in my blood, and not enough patience… but I do try to the the breathing thingy… I have a program I do for a few minutes ever so often…

      Liked by 1 person

  4. nrhatch

    I don’t have migraines now, but I used to get them regularly (but not with the degree of frequency you’re experiencing). So, no complaints.

    Something to consider: The more “antsy” your mind . . . the greater the benefit you may receive from calming it with breathing & meditation practice.

    The next time you feel a headache coming on, take 10 minutes out to practice this short meditation to head off the pain:

    Find a Relaxing Posture. …
    Breathe Deeply. …
    Mentally Scan Your Skull for Points of Tension. …
    Scan Downward Through the Rest of Your Body. …
    Calm Your Mind by Focusing on the Sound of Your Breath.

    From: Meditation for Headache Relief | HuffPost
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/david-magone/headache-treatment_b_1783691.html

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anne Lene @ MinimalistSometimes

      Thank you sweetie. When I came across the spoon theory a few years back, I remember I was reading and it was like… yep… that’s exactly how it life is right now… and I could almost have cried.. as it suddenly gave me a tool to explain it all, as I had struggled to find a good way to make people in my life understand. I know I don’t have an serious illness like she does.. but pain is pain sometimes, and regardless of illness there is still parts that will ring true…

      It looks like I might be slowly getting out of this current rut I’m in.. as I have had a couple of two or three days where I don’t need medication before I have a meds day again.. that’s an improvement from just a couple of weeks ago… things are definitely looking up, lol ๐Ÿ™‚

      Liked by 1 person

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