Category: Journey

Being “lazy” can be a good thing!

The last few months, I’ve had quite a few time-out moments.

You’ve probably noticed it, from the lack of consistency on this blog.

You might even go so far as to say I’ve been a bit lazy 🙂

Not the slouching on the sofa eating nothing but chips and pizza lazy (well, actually I’ve done a little of this too), but more the haven’t had the energy to sit down and write on my blog, clean my house, answer e-mail, exercise, kinda lazy.

With all the stuff that has been going on centered around my health, work and disability issues, I’ve had a need for an extended time-out. There are times in life where you need to listen to the body and follow it’s lead.

Just take the last week of January for example, which turned into quite a few busy days as it was the last week at my company. I think the air went out of me a bit after I officially said goodbye to my workplace. And I decided to just relax and do nothing.

So instead of rushing around doing all the things on my todo list (and there are a few things on it), I spent my time reading, watching movies, watching minimalist packing videos on youtube, hanging out with friends, booking a trip to Italy this summer (woohoo – and yes, I will write about it), being visited by my neighbor’s cats (soooo cute), sleeping in… you know! All those little things that makes life worth living 😉

The world around us is moving at a pretty fast pace and we as people are trying to keep up. We rush through life, with never ending to-do lists and commitment. Often never really stopping to “smell the roses” so to speak.

We stuff as much as possible into our days, rarely present, too focused on getting things done and racing against the clock. If you ask me, I would say that too much of this is exhausting and draining.

Yeah, I know, there is nothing really wrong with rushing – a little – but it’s difficult to rush and be present at the same time. I would go so far as to say it’s almost impossible to do so.

So why do we do it? Well, there are a lot of reasons for why. Some of them are because of; habit, avoidance, self-importance, guilt, competition, control, too much on our plate, pressure, false perceptions and sometimes even laziness (yeah, go figure)…

Let me explain!

For a lot of us rushing has become a habit, we are so used to it we don’t even notice we are doing it. It has become a state of mind, unconscious and addictive.

We fill our day with constant movement for a lot of reasons, one is we might actually have a lot to do :-). But often it is because one or more of these reasons; we don’t want to deal with our own feelings or stuff, we fear judgment, we want and need to feel needed, we feel guilty or even unworthy when we slow down, we feel like we “need to do stuff” to “be loved”, and sometimes might we feel like we have to do everything or life will fall apart.

Other times we stress because we feel a pressure to perform – from others and ourselves, we are afraid of missing opportunities and we don’t want to be bypassed. You might say we stress to impress.

Our society and us ourselves, tend to value doing over being. Sometimes it is easier to rush through life than to slow down. Rushing allows us to live on the surface, while being present takes energy and intention, as we will have to look deeper into ourselves.

So what is a person to do?

I have definitely been rushing through life at times, and I know I’ve been guilty of more than one of the reasons above for doing so.

I have however noticed that several of these reasons no longer are the same stress factors as they used to be. Maybe it’s age or maybe it’s because of this minimalist path I’ve been on. I believe it’s both.

With age comes wisdom they say 😉 I believe that as you move along in life, you’re priorities changes, and what used to be important to you might no longer matter as much.

I also know that my path towards minimalism, bundled with my health issues the last 5 years, have really had a big impact on me. Because of health, I have had to learn to slow down, and reduce the stress in my life. Because of minimalism, I no longer care as much about what everybody else thinks. There is no reason to “keep up with the Joneses” (not that I ever really did, but now even less so), there is no need to compete (because I’m good enough as I am), I definately don’t “need to do stuff” to “be loved” (if you don’t love me for who I am already.. well that just tough 😉 ) And I could go on…

I think it’s beneficial for everyone to slow down a little. Slowing down and being present can benefit your health, relationships and self being.

So how do we stop rushing through life?

Well for starters, we need to learn to take a break now and then. We need to listen to our body.

If you are tired, take a break. If you are stressed, do something for you that makes you happy. Go for a walk, play with your dog, open a window and look at the sunset and inhale, go for a run, read a book, work in the yard.. whatever that gives you a moment of happiness.

Yeah, but that’s not always easy to do.. you say.. I’ve got so much on my plate!

I know it’s not an easy thing to do, but try this one on for size: Stop and ask ourselves why.  “Why do I need to rush right now?” and “What is the rush?” Knowing why often reduces the pressure, and if you can’t even figure out why you are rushing through that particular task, why not just go ahead and stop altogether! Stop and take a breath. Take a moment to slow down, to allow yourself to be present.

Slowing down and letting go, allows you to be happier, you’ll make better decisions, you’ll inspire others, and it could change the way you look at yourself and everyone around you.

Too much stress on the other hand, and it can have a detrimental affect on your relationships and health. Just look at me 😦 It’s high stress over years and years, not listening to my bodys signal, that has ultimately resulted in me now being on disability. So please don’t be my kind of stupid, ok?

Let me tell you a little story!

A few years back, my boyfriend at the time, asked me a question while I was on the phone with him, telling him how I had done absolutely nothing that day. His question stopped me cold…  He asked Did you do it well?

I didn’t really understand what he meant at first.. What do you mean, did I do it well?

He answered back.. You’ve said you’ve done nothing all day… but did you DO it WELL? Did you do nothing well?

I had to stop and think, and realised that no I had not done nothing well.. Quite the opposite! I had jumped from one thing to another all day, not really accomplishing anything (hence the done nothing part)

I learned a valuable lesson that day! I learned that if you are going to have a “lazy/happy/fun” day, make sure to really have a lazy/happy/fun day. No “running around” working on things, no guilty trip over things that don’t get done. Instead, make sure you totally relax into that day 😉

So here is to taking a moment, a timeout so to speak, and doing it well!

I’m taking a cue from these guys, why not join me in a moment of your own 🙂

A lazy day

The end of an era!

Today is a bit of a milestone for me.

Almost 33 years ago (well 32 years, 7 months to be exact), on June 29th 1983, I started my career at my company. Today, on January 31st, I’m leaving it all behind.

Some of you might remember last summer, that I had to throw in the towel at work because of health reasons, when I had to go back to 100% sick leave, and apply for disability pension.

I’m happy to report I’ve been granted the pension 🙂  Sadly that means I will have to say goodbye to my company and my colleagues.

I started as wee little girl right out of high school, and work has been an integral part of my life, as I’ve lived for it. I love my job, and I love hanging out with my colleagues, so it’s sad having to leave.

During my time there, I have done a lot of interesting things and I’ve met a lot of great people. It’s been challenging, fun, some tears, more hugs 🙂 ups and downs, calm days and crazy days, but most of all – there has been loads and loads of laughter 🙂 I’ve made lots of friends, some who have turned into “family”.

As great as the work itself has been, there is one thing I am absolutely sure of, and that is – that it’s my colleagues, former colleagues, “family” and friends, who will always be the reason why it was as a great place to be. And the people are the reason why it’s hard to leave. It has been a pleasure working with them all, for all the inspiration and wonderful memories they have given me.

I know that often – out of sight is out of mind – and I’m sure I’ll fall out of touch with some, but happily I have good friends there, that I know I will keep in my life for a long time to come 🙂

As I leave the company, all I can say is a big – Thank you!

Thank you, all my colleagues, who have enriched my life! I will keep you close.

And now… what will my future bring? I have no idea, but I’m sure I’ll manage to fill this next chapter somehow 😉

 

Things that matter….

I just got back after a few days in Oslo, the capital of Norway, hanging out with some friends who was visiting from US, and it’s time to get serious with my decluttering again. During this summer anyone that have been reading my blog, knows my items out-the-door have pretty much been non existent.

I’m not sure why I have this persistent thought that I need to declutter some more… my house is pretty much under control, I have gotten rid of tons of stuff the last few years, and in most peoples mind I never owned that much in the first place.

I think it’s part of this minimalist journey, wanting to shed more, I see it with a lot of the other “minimalists in making” that I follow as well, that as you declutter and get rid of things, it spills over in other aspects of your life.

As we declutter we become more aware of the things that matter, of what is important to us, either in the items we own, the people we are with, or the things we choose to spend time on. So we continue to declutter our; physical items, digital stuff, mental clutter, social interactions and work stuff, in hope that we will reach the right balance. The right balance between health, family, friends, work and you!

For most of us, it’s a work in progress, a continuous path we are on, one that might never end, as we slowly evolve into the people we want to be.

And this is why I think I still feel compelled to declutter, I’m not yet where I want to be, as I still have loads of “stuff” I want and need to sort through.

Sometimes it takes an event or a major issue to wake you up! An event or issue so big, that it compels you to change your ways.

Me getting sick a few years back, have surely been an eye opener! It has put a lot of things into perspective, and made me realise a few things. I also lost my dad to an illness about 2,5 years ago, which really brought home a few truths, about how I had some of my priorities wrong.

I know I never really write much about the inner changes, this blog has mostly been about decluttering the physical stuff. I guess it’s because the physical stuff is more tangible, it is something you can show the results of.

The inner stuff is harder to put down on paper, especially since the change often is so subtle, you hardly even notice that it happens, until your are way down the line. Then all of a sudden you realize that you have changed, changed the way you view a few things, changed what is important, changed some of your priorities…

It’s this change that made me realise that there are certain things in life that is no longer worth the cost of having it in my life. It’s this change that resulted in me finally deciding to throw in the towel with work and prioritize health. Without this inner change, I would still be at it, working away, ignoring my health, slowly working my way down in a ditch I might never have gotten out of, while at the same time do irreparable damage to myself.

It’s this inner change that might one day make us realise, that the things we used to live and breath for, no longer is the center of our universes.

We might suddenly realize that, “Hey, I don’t care all that much about this thing anymore, this thing that used to be the most important part of my life, this thing I prioritized over everything else, to very often, the exclusion of everything else… whoah!”

I don’t write about my inner changes much, because I don’t know what to say, I can’t quite formulate it all. The only thing I can say, is.. that the changes I experience on my minimalist path, makes me more centered, calmer, more aware of what’s important, less materialistic, more aware of where my energy goes and more in tune with whom I want to be.

It’s a slow process, and I’m on my way.. not quite there yet, but on my way!

And the strangest thing, that every time I shed some physical stuff, it seems to help me along my path to shed some mental stuff. It’s probably because I have to seriously think about if the item is important to me and why. It might also be because I’m getting into the harder stuff, the family stuff, the photos that bring back all sorts of memories, the stuff after my dad, the stuff that carries with them their own ghosts.. some of them my ghosts…

So this is why I declutter, so that I one day might get it all cleared out!

I must be a “fraud”!

I think, I must be a fraud! There is no way I’m a minimalist!!

I just got back from visiting a new friend, a neighbour that moved in about two months ago.

I met her because she stopped over at my place to ask some questions about a couple of plants she had just bought (and just about killed already).

So what do I do? Well I just took it upon myself to get her a new healthy plant, and at the same time repotted her half dead ones in some pots I had at home! Her entrance area looks much more friendly now.

But let’s get back to the fact I’m a minimalist fraud…

As I delivered the plants, I got invited in. And yes, I know she had just moved inn after a newly divorce, so yes, I get that she might not have had all that much to start out with…  But her place was soooo minimalistic when it came to amount of furniture (some might say it was totally empty and bare), and soooo maximalistic when it came to empty space, and I loved it.

Upon entering my own place, I suddenly realised… I have a long way to go, before I’m a true minimalist…

Compared to most people, I’m doing pretty good on the minimalistic path. Comparing myself to my neighbour, I’m not sure I’m even a minimalist in training 😦

Thankfully, I don’t have to compare myself to anyone, this is not a competition 🙂  I know I have ways to go yet, before I’m where I want to be.

What I’m taking away from my visit to new friend, is the inspiration to continue to get rid off stuff, so that I might one day, end up with a place that gives me the same airy feeling, as I got when I stepped into her house.

So, it’s time to get cracking… again 😉

 

Out of commission – but still here!

I know, I’ve been out of commission for a while (again). And I am sorry (again)!

I seem to do a lot of apologizing lately, for not being able to keep up. I’m not doing to good at keeping up with family and friends, I’m definitely not keeping up with my house and garden (if you saw my house, you could attest to that. My garden on the other hand seem to enjoy the heck out of being left alone 😉 ) and I’m absolutely not been keeping up on my blog and my blog community.

I’m not sure why I feel compelled to keep apologizing all the time, I guess it’s just me feeling really bad about not being up to speed. I suppose life is like that sometimes, not always smooth sailing, now and then the sea is a little rough, and sometimes there are major storms, that keep you hanging on for dear life.

I’ve run into a bit of that rough sea lately (as you might have figured out from my extremely sporadic posts), and I’ve had to keep my focus super tight, and as a result my “life” and my blog, has, yet again, been put on the back burner.

This is not going to be one of these “let me get you up to speed with what’s going on” kinda post.

No, What I would like to convey, today, is that, I’m still here 🙂

I’m still here! And I’m working my way back! I don’t doubt I’ll be a bit, off again, on again, for a little bit longer, but I’m sure things will sort themselves out, and I will be back, stronger than ever!

I’m kinda figuring the best way to start back up is… just to, start! So I’m giving you notice, that my next few blog post might show some signs of me catching up, as I suspect they might be in a bit of a topic jumble 😉

Oh, yeah! There is one tiny thing I would like to let you in on. If you suddenly see a flurry of activity on your blogs coming from me, it is just me getting back up to speed on what my favourite bloggers have been up to. No, I won’t be spamming you with “thousands” of likes, but I will use the like button on the articles I do enjoy! So if you get a bundle of likes.. hey.. don’t blame me, it’s not my fault 😉 Oh.. and if I don’t leave a comment, it could be because someone before me have said it all.

So, please, if you can be so kind as to put up with my quirkiness for a little while longer, I’m sure I’ll be back to normal in no time… Yeah! Right! Like there is such a thing 😉

My 100th…

I can’t believe this is my 100th post!

Little did I know when I started out, how much having a blog would mean to me, and I never thought about all the milestones I would go through having a blog.

My first post – The start of my journey!

Suddenly I had my first like and my first follower, woohoo… But how on earth did they find me?

And thank you Jen over at Me woman you man for making the first comment on my blog – oh my I was excited. The cool thing! She is still with me 🙂

Soon followed the 10th post Taking a stab at my bookshelves, my 10th like, the 10th comment and my 10th follower – Ed my dearest friend 🙂

Fast forward and I’m hitting my 100 likes, my 100 comments and after a while my 100th follow by My botanical garden.

And not to forget! My first award, a Liebster award, quickly followed by a second Liebster award I sadly never wrote about, which was given to me by My Light Bag who got it from Laura at The next 50 years who got it from me 🙂  My third award was a Sunshine award and I believe I have a fourth award waiting for me (from Heather at Simply Save) whenever I get my act together to write about it 😉

And here I am; 170 followers, 3956 views, 735 comments (I believe the stats are counting mine as well, so half maybe?), 63 countries later, doing my 100th post!

It never dawn on me, starting out, that I would find kindred spirits, make blog friends, and feel like I belong to a community. Or how I would miss people when they stopped blogging (hopefully only for a while). Or how bad I would feel when I don’t have the time or energy to keep up with my community (I guess it’s just like with regular friends).

I never thought about how much pleasure I would get out of having a blog. How my mind is forever making post in my head, even though sometimes they never make it down on “paper”.

Or how I would be changing during the course of blogging and moving along my minimalistic path. How other bloggers have made me think about all sorts of things from taking better care of the environment, become more thrifty, eat healthier, travel more, single living (nice to know I’m not alone) and take better care of my health. I even believe the blogging community helped with my decision of taking a time-out!

I just want to thank you, my faithful followers, commentators, bloggers, for making my days more cheerful, mindful, reflective and sometime just plain happy 😉

Thank you!

Who the hell am I keeping it for?

I had a pretty interesting conversation recently, about what we keep. Why we keep it. Who we are keeping it for. And what interests will they have in what we leave behind!

As a woman with no kids and husband, there are not that much family left to give my family heirlooms to. The only ones left of my blood relatives are my mum, brother, half sister and some second cousins…

I have a large step-family (trough dad), but I’m assuming that whenever I’m not around any more, they might only be interested in some of my personal things. I can’t see that they would be much interested in things from my blood relatives, with maybe the exception of some of my dad’s stuff.

Thinking about this conversation have made me realize, that I’m keeping some thing from my past and my family’s past, that most likely nobody after me, will care one iota about! So who am I keeping it for? Well it turns out I’m obviously keeping it for me, and me alone! And that’s a pretty enlightening thought!

This morning I suddenly realized that keeping in mind, that I’m pretty much keeping things for me, and me alone, is going to make an big impact on my decluttering process.

I have a few bigger projects/tasks in mind for this fall. And I think the conclusion above is going to make these projects a whole lot easier to accomplish.

As an example I’ll tell you about – My huge photo collection. Tons and tons of albums, loose films, loose photos (not yet put into albums) and boxes of old inherited photos of people I barely know (or don’t know as it is). My intention have been to put the photos into albums (been working on it, on again, off again, the last few years) and the rule was, that what doesn’t go into albums will be tossed!

Somewhere along the way, I also decided I want to scan them all, so that I can have them as digital photos. Then I could clean up my albums. Since we are talking thousands of photos, this have seemed like such an undertaking, that I haven’t gotten it started yet.

Well this morning it dawned on me that, since I have no kids that will be interested. My half sister and my brother have no kids of their own (yeah we are really hopeless at producing kids). The family line is pretty much dying out with us (which is kinda sad when you think about it). So who am I keeping all these photographs for? Obviously no one! I can’t imagine my step family being interested in photos from my mums line of family, grandparents, their siblings and so on. Most likely they would just toss away the lot of it.

So what am I saying? Well for this instance, I’m saying my task of scanning suddenly got waaay less complicated. Conclusion is to keep a few key pictures as real photos (but only of people I know), scan a few more and then get rid of the rest. I mean seriously, I hardly ever look at those old photos, mum don’t ask for them and she is the only one left, who might know who they are. Dad have passed away, my brother wouldn’t care less, so why should I be so darned compelled to be the photos keeper?

So I just decided, I’m only going to keep the photos that are important to me! And me alone! So there 😉

Phew, I think I just went from several thousand of potential scans down to a third, hopefully less! But we will see how it goes when I start the job this fall 😉

But for now, I’m pretty happy with my conclusion.

I mentally decluttered a lot of things today! Especially since this doesn’t only apply to the photos…

What about you, have you ever thought seriously about what you are leaving behind, why and for whom? It might be pretty enlightening… and you never know, it might just shift a few priorities around!

Thriftiness getting in the way of decluttering?

I’m having a hard time…

Being that I have decided to only buy necessities this year, I’m trying to use up stuff I already have in my house.

As an example, let talk about… say…. toiletries!

I have all sorts of creams, hair products, facial stuff, make-up and so on. And it makes perfect sense to use up the items I have before I buy new!

Now, anybody that knows me, knows that, I have the shortest hair ever (by choice). I’d be hard pressed to use up one bottle of shampoo a year. I don’t really use hair products much. And I think I have a bottle of hairspray I’d be lucky to use up within the next 10 years.

If I manage to slap on some moisturiser in the morning, I’ve been good. Never mind facial cleanser, night cream, eye cream and other stuff.

I never really use make-up. If you see me dolled up in make-up even once a year, that’s a stretch 😉

But, and that’s the kicker, being a girl and all 😉 I do like pretty make-up and cool bottles of creams that smell nice, and my hairdresser always manage to convince me I need some products 😉

I have gotten really good the last couple years, only buying the creams/shampoo I actually use. BUT I still have cabinets full of things given to me, and items bought and not used up (or ever used). I’m not kidding you, when I tell you, that I use so little of everything, that it’s going to take years to use it all up.

So what’s the problem you might ask!

Well the challenge is that, while it makes perfect sense to use up the stuff, I really, and I mean really want to declutter my place, I just want the “crap” out of here!

In a way I’m letting my “thriftiness” get in the way of my decluttering . There are times I just want to let a “tornado” (yes, that would be me) loose and get the stuff out of my house.

But then my sensible (or we could argue, not so sensible) mind takes over.
“I should use this up, it makes perfect sense, since I’m not really buying much this year”
“I should give this away or sell this stuff, rather than recycle/toss is”
“I need to put it away, so that my sister, mother, friend, neighbour…(please feel free to add any others..)  gets a look at it, before I give to charity/recycle/toss”

All these arguments makes perfect sense – but they are getting in my way of getting the stuff out of here, and achieving the uncluttered space I’m working hard to get to. And it’s starting to frustrate the heck out of me.

Well, why don’t you just “toss” it all?

I don’t know, it’s what I want to do, but is feels sacrilegious to just “toss” things that are worth something to other people, and that might even generate some money for me. But right now holding on to stuff, just so that I can give it away, to family or friends, or make half a dollar on it, are starting to become a hassle, that just seem to stop me cold in my progress.

So what is a girl to do?

When I sat down to write today, I wasn’t really planing on writing this. I suppose this post took a turn of its own;-) It seems my frustration is bigger that I realised.  But, while writing this, I’ve come to realise what I need to do, to get a little closer, to achieving my goal of a somewhat more decluttered space.

I will keep stuff that I know I will manage to use up within a year.
Just take the toiletries mentioned above, I will keep hair products that I actually will use, but that darn hairspray is going. I’ll keep items I use, but (even if its a gift) I will get rid of things that I don’t see I will ever really get around to using or even start using within a year.

I will, when I declutter, ask friends and family if they want it (when it makes sense to ask) but, I won’t hold on to it longer than a few days, before they go out-the-door.

I will try to sell stuff that has enough value to make sense to sell (furniture or expensive items), everything else I won’t stress with. I understand that I might be able to make a buck or two, and total by the time this is all said and done I might have lost out on a 100-200 dollars or so, but that’s OK! I’d rather not having all the frustration and stress. And I think my bank account will survive 😉

But I will no longer, let the “rules” above get in my way. I’d rather just; not ask, not sell, not give away, if that makes my declutter process less frustrating and easier.

There is such a thing as, peace of mind, and right now, I think a decluttered space takes precedence over trying to be so darn “sensible”!

What about you?
How do you handle the balance between being sensible and “thrifty” and the need for a less cluttered space?  I would love any advice you might have, on finding a good balance.

Woohoo! A Liebster Award!!!

liebster2

Last week I was nominated for the Liebster blog award! How cool is that! Just three months into this blogging world 😉

The whole thing caught me completely by surprise. This is kind of random, and unexpected, and totally flattering… and it has taken me a few days to get it together. Thank you, Sandra at It’s Tidy Time for this wonderful gift.

Receiving the nomination, I got a little curious, what on earth is The Liebster Blog Award?

As far as I can see, nobody really know for sure, how or when this award started. But what I’ve gathered, is that it started as an idea, to recognize new bloggers. It’s given to bloggers by other bloggers, in order to create new connections, welcome them and bring attention to their wonderful blogs. COOL 🙂 As I find out more, I’ll put it together on a separate page

A short summary for now:

  • It’s on the internet only, as a virtual award.
  • It is given to bloggers by other bloggers.
  • “Liebster” is a German word, meaning dearest or beloved, but it can also mean favourite.
  • It follows the principles of a “chain letter”, in the sense that it should be passed forward to a certain number of people.
  • Each of us choose if we want to; accept it, and continue paying it forward or refuse it.
  • The “rules” have changed over time, so now several sets of rules exist.
  • It seems to have been started in Germany, late 2010.
  • Earliest reference I’ve found so far, is to a post on a German site December 19th, 2010.

Now back to my nomination 🙂

Thank you, Sandra over at It’s Tidy Time for nominating me for my first award, ever 🙂

Here are the RULES received from Sandra – not the original ones from back in 2010 – but a different set:

  • Thank the rockin’ blogger that nominated you
  • Answer the 11 questions you were given
  • Nominate 11 other bloggers with less than 500 followers
  • Post 11 questions for your nominees to answer
  • Tag your nominees and post a comment in their blog so they know they’ve been nominated!

ANSWERS to the questions I was given:

1. Where do you like to blog? Since it’s been winter since I started my blog, I blog at home, mostly curled up in my sofa with my laptop/ipad.
2. Who is your main inspiration in life? I don’t’ think I have a main inspiration, there are so many to be inspired by. A few:
– my friends Lisa and Mia for following their dreams, love you girls!
– Ed, for being the best dad ever (and my best friend), love you sweetheart 🙂  (and no, we’re not dating 😉 )
– my dad, who sadly passed away less than a year ago
– my step-mum for putting her “best foot forward” after loosing dad, after 30 odd years
– and there are so many more, way to many to count, so I won’t…
3. How do you feel about winter? Living on the west coast of Norway, winters tend to be wet and grey! So I gotta admit I love the season of sun and warmth! But if you give me a couple of cold, sunny snow filled days? Then we’re talking…
4. What was the happiest day of your life? Happiest day, oh gosh, there are so many, how to choose? So I won’t, and leave at it that 😉
5. Which movie makes you laugh out loud, literally? It’s Complicated, with Meryl Streep, Steve Martin and Alex Baldwin
– the Skype scene in it, just about had me fall out of my movie theatre seat, I was laughing so hard.
6. What’s your favourite candy? Why! Chocolate, off course 😉
7. If you could be any animal, what would it be and why? TIGER. They are confident, strong, independent, both solitary and social animals. I don’t know if it is because I would want to be like them, or because I am like them, that they appeal to me. I actually think it’s both! I can be both strong, independent, solitary and social. I think it’s the confidence the tiger has, that I wish I had little bit more off.
8. Android or iPhone? Both
9. What would be your favourite country to visit?
Counties I’ve already been to – US – I have so many friends there
Countries I’ve never been to – Africa – I’ve always wanted to go there
10. Coffee or tea?  Hmmm, Cafe Mocha – does that count?
11. What would your dream retirement scenario look like? Dream retirement! Living in a warmer climate, close to the beach, hanging out with friends, sipping margaritas 😉 and having the financial freedom to travel as much as I want.

MY NOMINEES
Okay, this is going to be difficult. Hmmm, let’s see… Voila! I pass The Liebster Award to – in no apparent order 😉

The Next 50 Years
Living not Wanting
365 minus 1
Musings from a Tangled Mind
Journey thru L
Me Woman You Man
Life Decluttered
newbieminimalist
quarteracrelifestyle
For the Love of Loving Things
Moving forward

There are a couple of blogs I would have loved to nominate – but they have more than 500 followers – so I’ll call them honorary mentions 😉

Simply Save – just squeaking by the 500 mark – already a Liebster – but absolutely worth a check
Life Out of the Box – I love how they use their time giving back to world by supporting school kids in less fortunate countries
Turquoise Compass – makes me want to buy a backpack – I wish I was 20 again…

QUESTIONS to my nominees
1. What is the one thing you are proud of?
2. If you won the lottery, by a substantial amount (so money was no longer a factor), what would you do?
3. Your absolute favourite dessert?
4. What three words do you think your closest friends would use to describe you and what three words would you use to describe yourself?
6. Your favourite quote?
7. Mountains or beach?
8. Can you sing?
9. What is number one on your bucket list?
10. Holy smokes! The apocalypse is here! Your family and pets are safe. You’re at home and can only take what you can carry. What do you save?
11. If you could have a teleportation device that connects your current location to one specific location, what would that location be and why?
12. You get a letter in the mail from 90-year-old you. She/He tells you 3 amazing things you’ve accomplished. What are those 3 things?

My final task, is to let the above bloggers know that I’ve tagged them.

I’m working on it. But you know what, I’ve been working on this for a while and I am anxious to get the post out of the “draft” folder, so I’m gonna go ahead and publish it and the individual notifications will show up eventually 😉

Auf Wiedersehen, mein Liebster’s 😉

Judging others!

We judge

This quote found it’s way to my mailbox, and the statement is so true..

And I’m guilty!

I’m guilty of having judged myself by my original intent; on what I was planning to do (even if I didn’t actually do that) while I’ve judged others by what they actually did.

I’m guilty of my behaviour not always reflecting my intentions.

I’m guilty of having given myself more “leeway”, while I have given others less or even none.

I’m guilty of having given people a hard time or even brushed them off because of their behaviour. Not having given them the benefit of the doubt.

Then again!

I’m also guilty of having given people to much benefit off doubt, having looked for good intentions, that might not have been there in the first place.

I’m also guilty of being too hard on myself for not having the right intentions or behaviour

How do I “judge” people?
By several things actually. How they act in public, how they speak to others, how they look, how they dress, what they say and how they say it. In a way it’s about morals, values, and ethics. There is a difference though, between people that I just pass during the day, and people that are in my life for more than a day.

For people I just pass in day, yes I judge them by their actions and I don’t always go out of my way to understand their intentions. They do say that “Actions speak louder than words”, and there are a truth to that. When it comes to people that are in my life for a longer time or even “permanently”, I try harder to find the intentions behind their behaviour. But then again, there is no doubt, I can do better…

So what does this mean?
I believe this means we should take a look at ourselves. It’s easier to to point the finger at someone else than it is to own up to our own flaws. Don’t be quick to judge anyone. Find a good median line, not to tough nor too lenient. Make sure we judge others how we expect them to judge us. Give others the same leeway we give ourselves, and give others the same benefit of doubt that we expect from them.  I believe we should strive towards having our intentions and behaviour aligned – to make sure the inside and outside convey the same message.

And when in doubt! Talk to people. Communication is the best way to avoid misunderstandings, don’t just assume we know their intentions from their behaviour. Give them a quick question about their intention, or what’s going on with them. We never know what day a person have, or what’s going on in their lives, that might affect their behaviour. Check it out… so at least you are clear about what’s going on, before you pass judgement. Make sure the “penalty fits the crime” so to speak 😉 And that goes for ourselves as well, that we are hard enough, but not too hard on how we judge ourselves.

And me? There is definitely times when my behaviour is out-of-whack, and I need to do a better job, at explaining my intention, or even say I’m sorry, when I see my behaviour is not the best (we all have bad days). I also need to get better at clarifying other peoples intention, before I let their behaviour affect too much how I feel (they might have a bad day too). There is obviously work to be done!

What about you…do your “inner and outer” send the same message?